Back To Wonderland
by Ice-Fire358
Summary: Sasori is captured by Itachi and it's up to Deidara and his friends to save him, and the only way to do that is for Deidara to go back to Wonderland. SasoDei KakuHid KisaIta. rated M for language and yaoi. Sequel to Deidara in Wonderland
1. Chapter 1

A/N sorry this took so long i went on a short five day vacation and just got back yesterday.

Deidara walked home from the park confused, "I don't get it why is it that I have the necklace that Sasori gave me but the rabbit hole is gone?" he asked himself.

The blond arrived home to see his mom sleeping on the couch snoring with the TV on. He grabbed the blanket off the back of the couch putting it over his mom and walked upstairs to his room getting ready for bed.

Stripping himself of his shirt and pants he climbed into bed laying down and falling asleep still thinking of his Monster loving redhead.

The next morning he woke up and looked at his clock to see it was 9:00 a.m. on a Friday. "Oh crap I'm late for school again," Deidara said.

Deidara climbed out bed and grabbed a faded blue shirt, black capris, and his black converse with drawings on the tips of the shoes from being bored in class.

He ran downstairs to see his mom still asleep on the couch, so he grabbed a bagel and ran out the door deciding to go to school today. "I wonder how much work I have?" he asked himself, thinking of the piles of homework he'd have.

Arriving at school he snuck in to his first class while his teacher was writing on the board. "Deidara I can see you, please go to your seat and you have detention," she said still writing on the board.

Everyone's heads turned to look at the blond and laughed at him except for his friends that stared in confusion as to why he'd come to school. Sitting at his desk a yellow sticky note was flicked on his desk.

He opened it to see his friend Kisame's handwriting. Kisame had been one of his friends that he'd known since they were younger, but his skin and hair were blue and he had unusual sharp teeth.

Inside it read

What made you decide to come to school today?

Deidara wrote back on it passing back to Kisame.

It's a long story I'll tell you about it at lunch k.

Once their first three classes were over they met at lunch with Lamb and Kira at their usual lunch table. "So Dei what did you do yesterday?" Kira asked, taking a sip of her SOBE.

"I went to the park and met a silver rabbit that lead me to Wonderland," Deidara explained, eating his food.

"Really?!" Lamb asked, excited.

"Yeah, I saw a silver rabbit named Hidan, a pot smoking butterfly named Konan, a march hare named Kakuzu, an evil prince named Itachi, an orange cat named Pain, and a handsome mad hatter named Sasori.

"Wow it sounds like you smoked too much pot," Kisame said, laughing.

"Well Sasori gave me a present," Deidara said, pulling out his scorpion necklace from Sasori and showed it to the three.

"It's a nice necklace, but you could have bought it when you ditched school yesterday," Kira replied.

"I have proof; I can show you after school."

"Ok Dei, after school you'll show us this "Wonderland", and I'll pay you fifty bucks," Kira said, reaching her hand out for Deidara to shake it.

Deidara grabbed her hand shaking it, "Deal."

after school in the park

Deidara lead his friends to where the hole had been hoping it had showed up today, "Okay it's just past these trees."

"I don't see a hole," Kira said searching for any signs of a hole, but there wasn't one, "Looks like I still have fifty bucks," she chuckled.

"Dammit there's no hole," Deidara thought, frustrated, "Only one thing to do."

Deidara took a deep breath and screamed, "Hidan you had better get your fat ass out here right now you dumbass!" making Lamb, Kira, and Kisame cover their ears.

Once Deidara was done yelling he waited to see if Hidan would come, but the bad mouthed bunny did not come out of the hole that wasn't even there.

Deidara reached into his pocket and pulled out fifty bucks holding it out to Kira, "Here you go Kira."

"Keep your money Deidara I believe that you probably did see a silver rabbit and this "Wonderland", and if you didn't mean it you wouldn't have screamed Hidan's name if you were lying. You'd be to embarrassed to do something that stupid."

"Good point, but why can't you get back to this "Wonderland"?" Lamb asked.

"I don't know, but there has to be a way to get back," Deidara said, thinking.

Kisame wrapped his arm around Deidara's shoulders, "Don't worry Dei I'm sure you'll be able to find this handsome redhead Sasori that you love so much." Kisame said, laughing at the now blushing blond.

As they all walked from the woods Deidara heard digging noises coming from behind him. He turned his head to see white paws beneath the dirt.

Pulling away from Kisame he dove for the dirt and dug the dirt up with his friends behind him watching curious.

Suddenly Hidan's head popped out from beneath the dirt and he looked at the four teens in front of him. "Hey Deidara, it's good that I didn't have to search for you."

"What do you mean?" Deidara asked, "Why are you even here?"

"Deidara you have to come back to Wonderland." Hidan said, brushing the dirt off.

"Oh my gosh you're so cute!" Lamb squealed, lifting Hidan up as if he were a baby and cradled him like one, rubbing his head.

"Hey let me- Can you scratch behind my ears?" he asked, rubbing his head against Lamb's hand.

Lamb scratched behind his ears making him smile, "Hidan pay attention, why do I need to go back to Wonderland?" Deidara asked, trying to get the zealot's attention.

"Oh yeah," he said jumping out of Lamb's arms.

Hidan explained what had happened in Wonderland once the blond had left. Sasori was still alive but his wounds were in bad condition after Itachi had stabbed him in the stomach, and he was the most heavily guarded prisoner there. Hidan and Kakuzu had managed to escape when the other guards were distracted.

"So when we escaped we went back to Kakuzu's house and thought up a plan, we decided that we needed you and anyone else we could get to help us." Hidan finished explaining.

"Okay then let's go," Deidara said, "Are you guys in?" he asked his friends.

"I'm in," Kisame said, smiling.

"Count me in too," Lamb said.

"Me too," Kira finished.

"Then let's go," Hidan said, going into the rabbit hole Deidara and his friends following behind him.

They climbed down the hole seeing all the beautiful colors and patterns. "It's like when I get high," Lamb said, watching all the colors.

"I thought I got you to quit?!" Kira yelled.

Lamb's eyes widened, "Um….. I did."

"You're lying! That's it give it to me." Kira commanded, Lamb giving her a fairly big sized bag of weed.

Falling on the floor lightly they walked to the new door there. The door looked at his watch out for list and seeing Deidara's picture on the top he opened the door for Deidara and the others. "Thank you door," Deidara said, walking through.

The door sighed, "That was close," he said, but he immediately blew up into pieces.

Deidara chuckled at the door blowing up, "He didn't think he was getting away with it did he?" Deidara asked, walking into the woods ahead.

The group walked through the woods seeing no one in sight. They arrived at the fork in the road to Sasori's house or Kakuzu's. "Which way are we going?" Deidara asked Hidan.

"Sasori's house," the zealot replied.

They walked to Sasori's house it wasn't the same as last time there was no music because the stereo was smashed, the 'tea party' was destroyed all the Monsters smashed and the deserts crushed, and the outside Sasori's house looked just as worse.

"We decided to come here since Itachi's cards have searched and destroyed everything here so there is no point for them to search again," he explained, hopping through the remains of the tea party.

Lamb dropped to her knees scooping up a smashed M-80 Monster, "This is terrible," she said, holding the energy drink in her hands.

"Lamb, it's a Monster there is nothing to worry about," Kisame said, patting the brunette girl's back.

"You can sometimes really be a freak," Kira sighed, looking for a can that wasn't destroyed to drink from.

"Proud to be one," Lamb said, laying the can back down.

The inside of Sasori's house was even worse, all his furniture was destroyed, there were more smashed Monster cans, and there were broken puppets scattered around the house.

"Hey dumbass, get your ass over here I brought Deidara here!" Hidan called, Kakuzu seconds later poking his head out from a door across the room. "You don't have to yell Hidan; I'm just down in the basement."

"What are all the stitches from?" Kira asked, looking at the stitches all over Kakuzu's body.

"Do you really want to know?"

"Yes."

Kakuzu walked towards Kira and removed his mask whispering something into the short haired brunette's ear, her eyes widening. "Wow," she said when Kakuzu had pulled away.

"Come on down to the basement, I have another plan worked out to get Sasori out." Kakuzu said, walking down the stairs with the others following behind.

"It's not going to be another stupid ass plan is it?" Hidan asked.

"You've tried other plans?" Deidara asked.

"Yeah, but they were all badly planned, so we decided to get help."

"Ok so since there are more of us the plan should work better."

"Then what is it?" Kisame asked.

"Well I was only expecting Deidara, but since you three are here I'm going to have to change the plan a little," the stitched man said, thinking of a plan that was sure to work.

"So what else has happened while I was gone?" Deidara asked Hidan.

"Well in the short time that you were gone the door that you blew up the first time was replaced by the door that blew you up today, Orochimaru and Kabuto are on Itachi's side for some stalker related reason, we have no idea what happened to Konan, and Pain is wanted for throwing a hairball at his pet weasel." Hidan explained.

"Itachi has a pet weasel?"

"Yeah his name is French fry, he's a scary little fer."

"He can't be that bad," Kira said.

"He has razor sharp teeth and a mouth fouler than mine," Hidan said thinking of the evil weasel.

"If he is such a menace then why is his name French fry?" Kira asked.

"His mother named him after his father." Hidan replied.

"Then what's his brothers and sisters name, Milkshake, Big Mac, and Cookie?" Kira asked.

"Hey how did you know his siblings names?" Hidan asked, with wide eyes. "Are you physic?"

"No just a lucky at guessing."

Deidara sat beside a small window looking out at the clouds while the others were talking, "Danna, I hope you're ok." He thought, thinking of the redhead he'd loved so much.


	2. Chapter 2

"Can I have my weed back please Kira," Lamb pleaded.

"No, you're going to be off weed for a long time."

"Please please please please pleeeeeeeeaaaaaaassssssseeeee!" Lamb begged now on her knees.

"No, it's bad for you. Besides you've been on it for three years, why can't you smoke cigarettes like other people?" Kira asked.

"Because you don't see all the colors, shapes, and talking animals with tobacco," Lamb explained to her friend. "Besides it's part of my hippie heritage. Also if I've been smoking it for years then why don't I have a lung disease?"

"Just because you're a hippie doesn't mean you have to, and the no signs of lung disease is unexplainable."

"But I want to, besides when I get really high no one around me gets hurt."

"What if you started driving, then people would be in danger."

"You know I don't like driving I walk or take the bus." Lamb explained.

"It's still no." Kira replied.

"Why?"

"Have you ever read "That Was Then, This Is Now"?" Kira asked.

"Yes many times." Lamb replied, thinking of the book.

"Do you remember M&M?"

"Yeah he was cool."

"Do you want to be like him?"

"It depends do you mean when he would stare into an M&M bag and look at the colors or after he smoked pot?" Lamb asked.

"After the pot."

"But I've never had those symptoms because my ma smoked it and I became immune to the bad effects when I was born," the long haired brunette said.

"Which is weird because you should have been born with birth defects," Kira said.

"What being immune to pot isn't a birth defect?"

"No, it isn't!" Kira yelled.

"Can you both shut the hell up, I'm trying to think!" Kakuzu yelled at the two fighting brunettes, his emerald green eyes shut tight in concentration.

"Why should we?!" they both asked in unison.

"Deidara, can you please control your friends," Hidan asked.

Deidara looked away from the window, "Kisame, can you please take care of Lamb and Kira?"

Kisame sighed, "Come on you two," he said, pulling them up by their collars and pulled them out of the room.

"Thank you Deidara," Kakuzu thanked the blond.

"No problem."

"I've got it!" Kakuzu exclaimed.

"Deidara help!" the blond heard Kira yell as she ran down the stairs.

Deidara jumped from his seat next to the window, "What is it, and where are Kisame and Lamb?" he asked worried.

"A lot of huge talking cards are here and they got Kisame and Lamb, we have to help them," Kira explained, grabbing Deidara's wrist and pulled him to the door.

"No, we can't risk getting captured." Kakuzu explained. "We won't be able to save Sasori."

Deidara stopped in his tracks, thinking if he should help his friends or Sasori.

"Don't worry Deidara we can save them both later, right now we have to escape." Hidan explained.

"He's right Kira we have to escape," Deidara said.

"Fine." Kira sighed in defeat.

"Come this way," Kakuzu ordered, walking towards a trap door and opened it. "Get in."

The three climbed into the underground tunnel and Kakuzu behind them as he closed the door leaving them in darkness.

"How do you expect us to see?" Kira asked.

"This," Kakuzu said clapping his hands twice making lights glow on the wall, showing thousands of empty Monster cans on the floor

"What is this tunnel for?" Deidara asked.

"Isn't it obvious? Sasori uses it to as a trash can for his Monster cans." Kakuzu explained.

"You know if he recycled them he could get a lot of money for the cans." Kira explained.

Kakuzu's eyes widened, "Hm, I'd be rich," he said.

"Stop thinking of money for once and let's get out of here so we can hear your plan," Hidan said hopping farther into the tunnel with Kira and Deidara following behind.

Kakuzu stayed behind and took out a chain and two locks tying them on the handles to make sure the cards didn't follow. Suddenly he heard banging on the door and he ran catching up with the three. "We have to get out of here know," he said running with Hidan, Kira, and Deidara farther into the tunnel.

As they ran farther into the cave they stopped when the lights stopped realizing that they were at the end of the tunnel.

Kakuzu pushed the door open, the sunlight seeping into the hole. They climbed out and before Kakuzu closed the door he clapped his hands making the lights turn off.

"Where are we?" Kira asked.

Deidara looked at their surroundings and realized where they were. "This is where I met Konan." Deidara said as he walked behind a huge mushroom finding the blue haired butterfly's hookah.

"Lamb would have loved to see that," Kira said thinking of her friend.

"Don't worry Kira we'll see them again." Deidara said patting her on the back lightly.

"Oh, hi Deidara!" he heard a female voice call behind him. He looked away from his friend to see Konan flying towards them. "How have you been?" she asked landing.

"Hi Konan, I've been good We're trying to save Sasori." He explained.

"Sasori is in trouble, what happened while I was gone?"

"You know Sasori?" Deidara asked.

"Yeah, we met a year ago at a party we smoked a lot of pot that night. He's a good person to spend time with when you're high," she smiled, thinking about that crazy night a year ago.

"What did you do?" Deidara asked.

"Well we sang a song that we thought was the best thing ever, but everyone thought it was a bunch of crap," she explained.

"That's what happens when you smoke pot," Kira said.

"Yeah, but that was a damn good show to us." Konan said, walking towards her hookah and sitting down to take in a long breath.

"Do you have to get high right now?" Kira asked.

"Yeah, I try to smoke five times daily," the blue haired butterfly said blowing smoke rings.

"You're like Lamb in a way with the pot smoking." Kira sighed.

Kisame and Lamb were being pulled along a trail by the cards with shackles on their arms and legs, "This sucks, we're being taken to Itachi's castle and I have no weed," Lamb complained.

"Don't worry Deidara and the others will help us," Kisame said, with confidence in his voice.

"Shut up you two," a black spade commanded.

"Why should I you ass?" Lamb asked, not afraid of the cards.

The card stopped in his tracks and turned to look at the brunette girl, "What did you just call me?"

"Oh crap, the card is going to regret this later," Kisame thought.

"I called you an ass!" Lamb yelled in the card's face.

The card pulled his arm back and attempted to punch her in the face but she ducked just before he'd hit her. "Is that the best you can do?" she asked, head butting the card in the stomach making him fall to the ground, giving her a chance to kick him as best she could with the shackles on.

Another card this time a three of diamonds ran toward Lamb punching her in the gut making her fall to the ground unconscious. He picked her up throwing her over his shoulder, "Let's go before Itachi has our heads." He said carrying Lamb toward the direction of the dark castle while two guards helped the black spade and the rest watched Kisame.

As they arrived at the gloomy castle they walked in through the front door to the throne room to see Itachi sitting on his black throne with two female servants beside him. "What do you have this time guards?" he asked in a monotone voice looking at Lamb and Kisame.

"When we went to check Akasuna Sasori's house again we hound this fish man, this brunette girl, and we saw another brunette girl with shorter hair." The three of diamonds explained, "We were only able to capture these two, the other girl escaped with Hidan, Kakuzu, and the blond boy you hate.

Itachi's eyes widened slightly, "So these two know Deidara."

"Yes your majesty."

"Put them both in the dungeon where we keep Akasuna and I will see them both when I feel like it." He said turning away, "Now leave me."

"Yes your majesty." They said taking Kisame and Lamb down to the dungeon.

The cards took the two down to the dungeon pushing them inside. As they were pushed inside Lamb awoke from coming in contact with the hard floor, "What the hell, where am I?" she asked.

"You're in a dungeon," a male voice in the darkness replied.

"Who are you?" Kisame asked.

"I'm Sasori," a redhead said moving out from the darkness showing himself.

"I can understand why Deidara likes you so much, you're hot," Lamb said, smiling at the redhead.

"You know Deidara?"

"Yeah he's our friend," Kisame replied.

"Are you from his world?"

"Yeah."

"Do you have a Monster?" the redhead asked his eyes wide.

"No." Lamb replied.

"Dammit!"

Lamb looked at the cloth around Sasori's stomach with blood staining it. "That looks like a bad injury."

"Yeah it hurts a lot but I got it to stop bleeding last night before I died of blood loss, but it needs to be cleaned and closed or it will get infected. It would have been better if Kakuzu was in the same cell as me when he was here."

"How could he help?" Kisame asked.

"He has a special ability to sew things with the black string in his body." Sasori explained.

"That's really disgusting." Kisame said.

"That is so awesome!" Lamb exclaimed, eyes wide in excitement.

Just then two cards walked through the door both of them diamonds, "The prince would like to see you both."

They pulled Lamb and Kisame out of the cell taking them to the throne room, "He wants to talk to the girl first," the five of diamonds said, pulling Lamb in leaving Kisame with the six of diamonds.

Walking in Lamb looked at the beautiful room it was huge and almost all of it was black or any other dark color, "This is a very nice room." She thought, until she saw Itachi sitting on the throne with a dark brown weasel with a black tip tail on his shoulder.

"Aww what a cute weasel." She said, making the weasel's fur bristle and growl at her.

"French fry, watch your mouth she is complimenting you, you should be happy," Itachi said petting the weasel on the head making his fur lay back down as he rubbed his head against Itachi's hand.

"You understand him?" Lamb asked, confused.

"Of course we have known each other since we were young." The raven said while French fry rubbed his head lightly against his cheek.

"That must be an old weasel."

"Yeah and yet he is as healthy as a horse, but anyways where is the blond and the other three you were with?"

"What will happen to them if I tell you?" Lamb asked.

"Well the blond will be killed in a gruesome way and the others will die in many different gruesome ways." Itachi explained.

"Well what if I don't tell you?"

"Then you will become my servant and the fish man with you will be my manservant where everyday you will both be treated like crap."

"I'd rather die than become a servant or rat my friends out!" she spat at the raven.

"Fine then, guards take this girl away and bring the fish man in." he commanded, looking away from girl.

A diamond took Lamb away as another diamond came into the room with Kisame. Itachi looked at the fish man his eyes widened slightly when he'd gotten a good look at the man. "So fish man where are your friends?"

"Now why would I tell you that?" he asked, smirking at the prince showing his sharp teeth.

"Because if you don't I'm going to kill you or torture you in some sick way."

"Sorry dude but I'm not going to tell you."

Itachi glared at the blue man, "Guards take the fish man away!" he yelled.

"It's Kisame not fish man!" Kisame said as he was pulled out of the room.

"Like I care," the raven said, earning a confused look from French fry. "What?" he asked the weasel.

French fry made a few squeaks. "I know that was unlike me but he was pissing me off." Itachi replied.

The weasel made more squeaks making Itachi get pissed, "I do not like him!" Itachi yelled, turning away from the weasel concerned for his master.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N Sorry this took so long i've been working on Asylum's sequel and reading the Rainbow Boys series (damn those boys are yummy!) Please enjoy :D

* * *

"So Kakuzu what's the plan," Kira asked.

"Well I was just going to get Deidara to blow the wall up and we could bust Kisame, Lamb, and Sasori out," Kakuzu explained.

"That has got to be the dumbest plan I've heard," Kira said.

"Yes but there is more of it, if we want Deidara to even get close enough there has to be a distraction," Kakuzu said.

"Which we will cause," Hidan finished the miser's sentence. "Besides now we really need to save that Lamb chick."

"Why do you care?" Deidara asked, curious to Hidan's concern with Lamb's well being.

"Once someone has rubbed the back of my ears I'm dedicated to help that person anytime they fucking need me." Hidan explained.

"Really?" Kakuzu asked, smirking.

"Don't even think about it fucker." Hidan warned.

Kakuzu sighed, "Anyways Hidan and I will cause a distraction making the cards come after us and you two will bust the others out," Kakuzu explained the full plan to Kira and Deidara.

"Ok then let's go," Deidara said walking toward Itachi's huge castle with the others following behind.

"Bye you guys I'll be here all day," Konan said waving goodbye before she took in another puff from her hookah.

"Meal time!" a card called, shoving in three plates of decent looking food inside Lamb, Kisame, and Sasori's cell

"Lamb it's chow time," Kisame called the long haired brunette, grabbing a plate but she didn't move from the corner she was in.

"Lamb?" Sasori called this time for the girl.

Kisame stood and slightly nudged her gently with his foot. "I'm not hungry," she groaned laying in a fetal position and pulled her hood over her head shivering.

"What's up with her, is she a drug addict going through withdrawal?" Sasori asked, biting into a stale piece of bread.

"Maybe," Kisame said watching Lamb.

"N-n-need w-weed," the brunette stuttered.

(A/N You guys are going to be able to understand what French fry is saying, but remember only Itachi and Hidan can understand him.)

Itachi sat on his throne, petting French fry who was on his lap sucking the yolk out of an egg, "Itachi-san you seem more quiet than usual," the weasel said, licking the yellow substance off his muzzle.

"I'm just thinking."

"About the fish man?" French fry asked.

"No, of course not, he's too immature." Itachi replied.

"Itachi, I've known you for years, you like the fish man and if you do you need to spend time with him," French fry said, throwing the egg away.

Itachi lifted French fry up and looked at him, "Hey! Put me down, I don't like to be man handled!" the weasel squeaked, trying to get out of Itachi's hands.

"I'll talk with the fish man, but don't expect me to do anything more," Itachi said, putting French fry back down.

"That's more like it," the weasel said, licking his fur.

"Guards!" Itachi called, "Bring the fish man back here!" Itachi ordered.

"Yes sir," two cards said in unison, walking away.

As Deidara and the others walked farther into the dark forest they heard a loud growling coming from the trees farther ahead of them, "What the fuck was that?!" Hidan exclaimed.

Kakuzu put his hand over Hidan's mouth to silence him, "Everyone be quiet," he ordered.

"What is it Kakuzu?" Deidara asked the stitched man.

"We're going to have to take the long way to Itachi's castle," the banker explained.

"Why, this way is faster," Kira said, confused with the banker's change of plans.

"Over those trees is the lair of the ugliest creature in the world called the Sakurwock," Kakuzu replied.

"What's a Sakurwock?" Deidara asked.

"It's an ugly creature with pink hair, green eyes, buck teeth, sharp claws, and wings," Hidan explained shuddering at the thought of the repulsive creature.

"So what's the big deal?" Kira asked.

"People try to avoid it because of its ugliness and fierceness." Kakuzu said.

"Then I'll kill it so we can get to Lamb, Kisame, and Sasori faster," Kira said, "You in Dei?"

Deidara smiled, "Of course."

Kira pulled out two knives from her jeans pocket and handed one to Deidara, "Let's go kill a Sakurwock." She said happily walking to the ugly monster's lair with Deidara behind her.

"Might as well as go with them and make sure they don't get killed," Kakuzu said him and Hidan following behind.

Deidara and Kira hid behind a bush in front of the cave and saw the Sakurwock in its cave looking at its surroundings.

"Oh god, it's so ugly," Kira said, putting both her hands over her mouth, trying not to puke at the beast's ugliness.

The monster's ears perked up and growled in their direction. They'd been spotted, "Oh crap!" Kira cursed.

The Sakurwock stepped out of the cave showing it's real height which was way taller then them.

"Attack!" Hidan yelled, running toward the monster and biting it's foot. Kira ran toward the monster and jumped on it stabbing the pink monster numerously. Deidara jumped on the beast and stabbed its foot. Kakuzu standing a good distance away from the monster attacked it with his thick black threads stabbing the creature in a lot of different places.

Kira climbed on the Sakurwock to its wings and stabbed them making the monster shriek in pain and fall to the ground, still alive.

The Sakurwock stood and swiped at Hidan with her sharp claws, making the rabbit fly through the air. Then the monster hit Kakuzu with her tail pushing him away from her.

Deidara struggled to stay on the monster and stabbed her side, making the monster swipe at him but missed almost hitting his head, "Kira, go for the neck!" Deidara yelled at the brunette girl who was climbing up the pink monster's neck.

Kira gripped the knife tightly and stabbed the Sakurwock in the neck and slid down the neck like a fire pole leaving a long gash along the neck, "Take that you bitch!"

The monster fell to the ground dead with blood all along the monster's neck. Deidara pulled his legs out from underneath the monster and looked around for Kira who wasn't in sight, "Kira!" Deidara called, but the girl was nowhere to be seen.

Kakuzu stood and looked around for Hidan, "Hidan where are you?"

"Over here dumbass," Hidan called from behind the bushes.

Kakuzu pulled Hidan out from the bushes and his eyes went wide. The Sakurwock had sliced the silver rabbit's stomach open his stomach and intestines showing with blood on his fur.

"Can you stitch this up Kakuzu? It really hurts."

Kakuzu sighed and stitched Hidan up, cleaning the blood off, "There, try not to open that back up." The miser said kissing Hidan on the forehead.

Deidara frantically searched for Kira but couldn't find her, "She must be under the monster," the blond thought. He tried to move the creature's neck but it was too heavy.

"Blondie, it's no use, she's dead," Hidan said, trying to stand up.

Deidara glared at the silver haired rabbit and continued to search, until he noticed an arm sticking out from beneath the Sakurwock's body. He ran toward the arm and pulled an unconscious Kira out from beneath the creature.

He put his head against her chest to search for a heartbeat, finding a faint one, "Wake up Kira," he shook the girl, making her wake up.

"Is it dead?" she asked, looking at the monster.

"Yeah, you killed it," Kakuzu replied.

Deidara pulled Kira into a tight hug, "I thought you died."

"You're crushing me," the brunette said, struggling to try and get Deidara to let go of her.

Deidara pulled away from Kira and handed her back her knife, "Thanks for the knife."

"No problem," she said, putting it back in her pocket.

"That sure is an accomplishment, defeating the Sakurwock is a great thing you've done for Wonderland." Kakuzu said.

"Where is your other knife?" Deidara asked.

Kira felt a sharp pain in her arm and looked at her arm finding her knife in it, she grabbed it and pulled it out slowly wincing at the pain.

"Let me stitch that up for you," Kakuzu said, grabbing Kira's arm, rolling her sleeve up, and stitched her up too.

"Thanks."

"Before we move does anyone have any cuts that need to be stitched up?" Kakuzu asked, getting a no from the others, "Then let's get moving."

The four of them rose from the grass and walked past the dead Sakurwock continuing their journey to Itachi's castle.


	4. Chapter 4

Itachi sat on his throne as two guards walked in with Kisame in tow, "Why your majesty, it's nice to see you again," the shark smirked.

"Guards, you may leave," the Uchiha ordered the two guards, who gave him a look of confusion, "I can take care of myself."

Both shrugged and left the room leaving Itachi, Kisame, and French fry, who was sleeping on the raven's lap.

"So is there a reason why the Prince has graced me with his presence?" Kisame grinned.

"Hn, you ungrateful fish," Itachi growled only making the blue man's grin widen.

"How can you insult me when I've been nice to you?" Kisame asked, pouting.

"Because you are merely a peasant that is lower than one such as myself," Itachi replied.

"I think you like me," the fish smirked.

Itachi glared at the fish, "What would give you that idea?!" he growled, waking French fry from his sleep.

Kisame stood and walked closer to the Uchiha, "I don't know, maybe because you called me back here again, which means you either seem to like talking to me or you may like me a lot."

"Get back fish man!" French fry growled, which just sounded like growling to the shark.

"I thought you wanted me to talk to him?" Itachi asked looking at French fry.

"He's way to close to you for my comfort," the weasel growled, his fur standing.

Suddenly Kisame pulled Itachi's chin up to face him and pulled him into a passionate kiss.

On their way to Itachi's castle, which was still far away Deidara and the rest of the group were resting by the trees. Hidan was picking at his stitches when Kakuzu whacked his hand, "Stop, picking at those!"

"I can do whatever the fuck I want asshole!" Hidan growled, continuing to pick at them.

Kakuzu tackled Hidan to the ground and tied his hands behind his back, and then tied his legs up, "Now you had better sit still!" he snarled while Hidan tried to bite free from the bonds.

Seeing how hot Hidan looked tied up Kakuzu lifted him up and carried him behind the bushes, "Hey! What the fuck!" Hidan exclaimed behind the bush, "Get the fuc- oh Jashin, harder!" Kira and Deidara heard Hidan moan.

As Kira and Deidara sat, listening to both of them they sighed in relief when the silver rabbit screamed, "HOLY SHIT!" he cursed as they heard both men collapse onto the ground, panting.

Both teens stared at the bush as Kakuzu walked out with a now sleeping rabbit in his arms, "We should start moving now."

"What the hell just happened?!" Kira exclaimed.

"Isn't it obvious? I just had hot rabbit sex with Hidan," the banker replied.

"I know that! What was the point of that?" she asked.

"It was to stop him from opening his stitches and he looked really hot tied up," he replied, smirking behind his mask.

Kira sighed at her answer but carried on following Kakuzu.

As they walked farther into the woods a rustling came from the bushes and a red blur jumped out picking Deidara up and carried him away, while a black and brown blur jumped out after it pushing Kakuzu down, and picked Hidan up carrying him away also.

Kakuzu growled as he stood and followed both blurs into the woods with Kira struggling to keep up behind him.

After chasing after both blurs Kira managed to catch up to the red blur and tackled it to the ground, making Deidara fall from the person's arms. The red blur turned out to be a red haired boy with black eyes wearing mostly black clothes.

The black blur had stopped also and he looked almost exactly like Kakuzu but without the mask on showing shoulder length black hair.

"Sasori?!" Deidara gasped as he stared at the redhead in shock.

"That isn't Sasori, Deidara," Kakuzu explained, "His name is Sori, and this ass over here is Kuzu," the stitched man explained, "They're what you could call our doubles. We're the only people that have them, but they're trouble."

"Aw Kakuzu how can you say something so mean," Sori pouted, "I was merely trying to get my precious Dei-kun since Sasori is in prison."

"Cut the crap, we're going to save Sasori now," Kakuzu growled, keeping an eye on Hidan.

"That's too bad I really wanted to spend time with Dei," he smirked at the blond.

Hidan stirred in Kuzu's arms and opened his eyes, staring at him, "Why the fuck isn't your mask on?"

"So I can do this," Kuzu grinned, kissing Hidan on the lips.

Kakuzu growled as he attacked Kuzu tackling him to the ground, "Hey I'm still here fuckers!" Hidan exclaimed getting crushed between both of them.

Deidara watched still confused when he was pinned to the ground by Sori, who was straddling him, "Watching those three wrestle on the ground is making me horny," he groaned as he rubbed his groin against Deidara's making the blond let out a moan.

"Get off of him you perv," Kira tackled the redhead to the ground and both wrestled on the ground.

Kira eventually managed to pin him down, "Got you!"

Sori struggled under her grip but gave up, "I hate you."

Kuzu growled as he was also pinned down by Kakuzu as Hidan managed to crawl out from beneath both of them, "Retreat?" Kuzu asked Sori who nodded as he kicked Kira in the gut running away with the other stitched man following him.

"Hidan?" Kakuzu called.

"What?!" he growled.

"Ok, you're fine, let's start moving," he ordered, picking Hidan up again.

"How can you say that when we just ran after and fought with them?!" Kira asked, panting.

Kakuzu sighed, "Fine a short break, but we're going to start moving again in five minutes."

"You ass," Kira cursed, sitting down beside Deidara.

"Oh fuck, I'm bleeding again!" Hidan cursed.

Kakuzu laid the rabbit down and looked at his blood stained fur, "I can't believe you reopened it!"

"Hey you two were fighting and if you forgot I was in the middle of it! You inconsiderate asshole!"

"Yeah, yeah," Kakuzu sighed, stitching the cursing rabbit up again, while he still continued to curse.

"I had better get a lot of fucking waffles when this is over!" Hidan growled.

"Sure, when this is over I'll make you all the waffles you want," the banker sighed, as he finished up.

"You got that right bitch!"

Itachi struggled to push Kisame away while French fry was biting his arm with razor sharp teeth, but the fish wouldn't pull away no matter how much the weasel was biting or how much the Uchiha was pushing him away.

French fry pulled away from the man's arm that bled heavily and dived for his throat to finally have the other pull away before the weasel had bitten down.

"How dare you," the Uchiha growled as he stood balling a fist and punched the fish in the chest, who didn't seem fazed at the action.

"Damn it," Kisame cursed at his cut. He tore off a piece of his shirt and tied it around the cut to prevent any more bleeding, "You know I expect you to kiss this better."

"Hn."

"Don't you 'Hn' me Itachi, kiss it," he said, extending his arm out.

"Get that out of my face," he growled pushing it away, making Kisame wince, "Ow!"

Itachi's eyes widened at the shark's pain, "It can't hurt that much."

"It does, unless you kiss it. Then it may feel better," Kisame smirked.

"Guards!" Itachi called, and two guards immediately ran in grabbing Kisame's arms, and pulled him out, "Hold on!" the bigger weasel called.

Itachi ran over and lifted Kisame's injured arm, kissing it gently, "I knew you liked me," Kisame smirked as he was pulled out of the throne room.

Once the shark had left the room Itachi shook his head, "Stupid shark." He said to himself as he returned to his throne.

A/N yay, i updated this! and i got rid of the writers block so expect more chapters soon!


	5. Chapter 5

Sasori sat in the cell quietly as Lamb shivered in the corner. He couldn't help but think about Deidara, he missed the blond so much.

Suddenly Kisame was pushed back into the cell with a smile on his face, "What happened to your arm?" the redhead asked.

"French fry bit me, but I'll be fine," he replied as blood dripped from the blood soaked cloth.

"It's dripping!" the scorpion exclaimed.

Kisame looked at his arm and shrugged, "Oh yeah," he said and tore off more of his shirt, tying that over the old bandage.

"Are you ok?" Sasori asked.

The shark looked at him and nodded, "I'm fine," he replied as he crawled over to the wall and leaned against it, rubbing his injured arm.

"We have to get out of here," Sasori thought to himself, when an idea popped into his head, "Hey Kisame, I've got an idea of how we can get out of here."

"What is it?" the fish asked leaning closer to the redhead so that he could hear the plan.

"All we have to do is," he said then whispered the rest of the plan into his ear.

They both pulled away and nodded. Then they sat back and waited for their plan to begin.

Once they'd rested for a while Deidara and the rest of the group carried on walking to Itachi's castle which wasn't that far away now. It wouldn't take them much longer until they were at the castle and could rescue Sasori and the others.

"We'll stop here," Kakuzu announced, sitting down on the grass.

"What the fuck are you talking about?!" Hidan exclaimed.

"We're going to sit here a think about how the plan will go so that we don't fail this time," he explained.

"That's sounds good," Kira said, as she sat down on the grass too.

Deidara and Hidan sat down on the grass too, and all of them stared at Kakuzu, expecting him to say something, "Well?" Deidara asked.

"Here's how it's going to go," the miser explained, "As I said before, Hidan and I will distract the guards, while you two run to the west side of the castle, Deidara you will set the bombs while Kira watches for guards that may come in case we can't keep them busy. Got it?"

All three nodded, "Let's go!" Hidan exclaimed, standing up.

They all stood and walked on to the castle till they were at the gate where two guards stood. Kakuzu and Hidan charged while Kira and Deidara quickly moved around to avoid it. Both men quickly caught up with them, "I was expecting more," Hidan growled, as they ran through the maze.

Suddenly more guards jumped from the maze, "Halt," one called, but Hidan head butted him in the gut knocking him down while Kakuzu took care of the other's with his thick black strings.

Deidara and Kira moved around them to the west wall where the jail was supposed to be and Deidara started to work on clay spiders, while Kira watched for guards that might try and stop the artist's work. She pulled out both of her knives as four guards approached.

Kira quickly ran at them, aiming for vital points and slit one guard's throat while cutting the one behind hers stomach open, but unfortunately one guard had gotten lucky and cut Kira's leg leaving a deep gash. She fell to the ground but continued to fight them, cutting their legs up and kicked them with her good leg.

Deidara noticed his friend in trouble and hurried himself until he'd gotten the last bomb attached. He made a hand sign, "Katsu!" he exclaimed, giving a huge explosion that blew the blond, Kira, and the guards back.

Prisoners in their cells looked out at the four and cheered running out quickly to freedom. Deidara scanned the cells for Sasori or his friends to see them sitting in a cell astonished.

Kisame stood and picked a small bundle in the corner that was Lamb and carried her out. Sasori walked out glaring at the sun, and smiled as he saw Deidara on the ground staring at him in astonishment, "Danna."

Sasori walked over to the blond and leaned down wiping the blonds face to find out that he was crying, "Happy un-birthday Dei," Sasori said and pulled the blond into a passionate kiss.

Kisame laid Lamb down on the ground next to Kira, and sat beside her.

Kira put her knives away and reached into her pocket to pull out a bag with weed in it and a skull lighter. She opened the bag and put it by Lamb's face. The long haired brunette sniffed the weed and sat up, "I was wondering where this was," she said, taking her bag and her lighter.

"I jacked it while we were arguing," Kira explained, tearing off a piece of her shirt and wrapped it around her gash.

Sasori pulled away and looked around, "Where is Kakuzu?"

"He and Hidan are taking care of the guards," Deidara explained, then looked at the blood stained cloth wrapped around Sasori's stomach.

"We have to move now, the guards will come because of the explosion," Sasori explained.

"So much for your plan Sasori," Kisame said, standing up, carrying Kira this time.

"This sucks," Kira growled, not liking the idea of being carried.

Just on time Kakuzu and Hidan ran up with blood on both of them, "Let's go!" Kakuzu ordered, running into the woods with the others behind him.

"Where are we going?" Sasori asked.

"We can't go back to the house but I know a place they'll never look for us," the stitched man explained as they ran into the dark part of the forest.

After time they came to where they had slain the Sakurwock, the beast's corpse still where they had left it, "What the hell happened?" Sasori asked as he stared at the ugly monster.

"I killed it," Kira said proudly as they walked into the monster's bone filled cave and rested there.

"We'll stay here and get everyone healed, then we can move," Kakuzu explained, "Who needs stitches?" He asked, scanning the six.

He saw to Sasori first looking at the deep cut and stitched it up, "Don't try to do a lot of running or fighting," he ordered the redhead.

Kakuzu quickly stitched up Kira's leg and Kisame's arm then they all sat in the cave and waited.

Itachi sat on his throne as a guard ran in, "Prince Uchiha all the prisoners have escaped!"

The Uchiha growled, "How could you let them escape?" he asked, petting French fry.

"I'm sorry sir, we tried," the guard explained.

Itachi stood making French fry jump out of his lap and stare at him, "What is it Itachi?" the weasel asked.

"We're going to look for them," he replied walking out of the throne room and walked to where the guards were to be and walked in, "I need at least fifty of you to come with me and catch the prisoners," he explained.

Fifty guards stood and followed the prince out of the castle, "Where do we search Prince Uchiha?" one asked.

Itachi looked at his surroundings until the dark forest caught his attention, "The dark forest, search everywhere," he ordered.

French fry ran over and climbed up the Uchiha's body to rest on his shoulder, "Itachi, will you be able to attack the shark if you encounter him in battle?"

"Of course," the raven snapped, "Why do you ask?"

"Just wondering," the weasel sighed.

"French fry lead the way," Itachi said putting the weasel on the ground and let him sniff around.

"This way he squeaked," and Itachi followed him with the guards uncertainly following behind.

It became dark as they all sat in the cave, starving, "Isn't there anything to fucking eat?" Hidan asked as his stomach growled.

"We could eat the Sakurwock," Kakuzu suggested.

"I'd rather die than eat that ugly beast," Kira growled.

"I agree," Lamb sighed as her stomach growled.

Kakuzu sighed, "Fine I'll go look for something."

Lamb looked out and stood, "I'm going to look for some wood," she explained and walked outside. She stayed close to the cave as she picked up twigs and any other dry wood that wood be useful.

After having a good amount of wood in her arms she walked back to the cave and made a little place where a fire could be. She pulled out her lighter and lit it getting a good fire started, "Nice job," Kira high fived the other brunette.

Kakuzu returned later with five squirrels, "Ahh! Poor squirrels!" Lamb cried.

"You're eating it," Kakuzu growled as he began to cut the squirrels and laid the meat down. He cooked up a few pieces and handed enough meat to everyone, even Lamb who hesitated for a few seconds but ate anyways.

"This is great!" Hidan said happily munching on the meat.

Kira stared at him in disgust as he cleaned his fur of the juices, "You're a pig."

"What'd you say bitch?!" Hidan asked.

Kakuzu growled, "Don't start fighting now."

Deidara and Sasori sat and watched as the three argued. Sasori looked at the scorpion necklace around Deidara's neck, "I see you still have my gift." He smirked.

Deidara blushed, "Of course Danna."

"That's good," the redhead said and leaned against the blond, sighing in content, "It's good to be back with you. I missed you."

"I missed you too Danna," Deidara said as they sat in the cave happy to finally be with each other.

A/N omg, it may be ending soon! but until then please enjoy.


	6. Chapter 6 END

As the sun rose French fry led them to a cave where the Sakurwock laid dead, "Attack," Itachi ordered as all the guards attacked the seven people in the cave.

"You fuckers!" Hidan cursed as he faced three guards at once.

"Kira, give me a knife," Lamb said as her friend handed her a knife and stayed in the cave with a knife ready if she had to fight with her injury.

Sasori sat back and looked around. He spotted the Sakurwock and attached his chakra strings to it making it stand and attack the guards. Deidara threw bombs at some guards and Kisame punched and kicked the guards.

As their numbers began to dwindle there were a few guards, Itachi, and French fry left, "Hello Hidan," the weasel smirked.

"French fry," Hidan growled.

Both ran at each other and began scratching, biting, and kicking one another.

Itachi dodged the rest of the fight and pulled out his sword running at Deidara prepared to attack "Hey your majesty!" he heard someone and looked to have Kisame tackle him to the ground, "Why don't you fight me?" he smirked at the raven.

"Get off me!" the raven called picking up his sword and positioning it at Kisame's heart, "I'll kill you if I have to."

"Itachi!" French fry called running over to aid the Uchiha but Hidan jumped on him pinning him to the ground.

"Then kill me," Kisame grinned.

Itachi glared at him, but sighed and dropped the sword, "I can't."

"Now tell your friends to stop attacking my friends," he said

"Guards, stop fighting," he ordered the guards and they dropped their weapons.

Kisame got off the Uchiha and helped him up, "So why'd you let me live?" he asked.

Itachi glared at him and turned his head away, avoiding the shark's eyes.

Kisame grabbed the raven's face in his hands and pulled him into a kiss. Itachi's eyes widened at the action, but relaxed and kissed back wrapping his arms around the shark's neck.

Everyone stared shocked except French fry who sighed, "I knew he wouldn't do it."

The fight had ended and now Itachi and his group stood across from Deidara's group, "I'm sorry about the fight," Itachi said.

"It's fine," the blond sighed.

Itachi then looked at Kisame, "Kisame, would you like to live with me in the castle?"

"Totally," the shark replied.

Deidara looked at him shocked, "What about your mom?"

"She won't give a damn about me," he replied.

"Then let's go," Itachi smirked and Kisame hugged Deidara, Lamb, and Kira goodbye, "Later guys," he waved goodbye to them and left with the Uchiha.

"Bye French fry!" Lamb waved goodbye to the weasel.

"Freak," the weasel sighed as he climbed back up on Itachi's shoulder.

"We can go home now," Kakuzu sighed and began walking with the others to Sasori's house.

"Home sweet home," Sasori sighed in content as he walked over to a cooler and pulled out a Monster. He quickly chugged the energy drink down and burped.

"It's going to cost a lot of money to fix this up!" Kakuzu exclaimed.

Sasori wrapped his arm around Deidara's waist, "Don't worry I can fix it," he explained, and used his chakra strings to fix up the place till it looked the same, "See."

Everyone sat at a chair except Deidara who sat on Sasori's lap and Hidan who sat on Kakuzu's lap. It was all finally over, "Deidara?" the scorpion asked.

"Hm?" the blond asked, looking at him with blue eyes, "What is it Danna?"

"I want you to stay here with me in Wonderland," the redhead asked, kissing the blond on the cheek

"Of course Danna," the blond replied, kissing the other on the lips.

Weeks passed and Itachi and Kisame sat in their own throne, "Where is my captain of the guard?" he asked a guard.

"He died sir, a girl with knives killed him during the fight a few weeks ago," the guard explained.

Itachi stood, "Kisame, we are going to Sasori's house," he explained and the shark followed him.

They both arrived to see Sasori, Deidara, Kakuzu, Hidan, Lamb, and Kira sitting at the table drinking Monsters and eating sweets, "What the fuck do you want?" Hidan asked.

Itachi looked at Kira, "I want her to be my captain of the guards," he said, pointing at Kira.

Kira stared at him, "Do I get to kill people?"

"Yes," Itachi replied.

Kira shrugged, "I'll do it, but I want Lamb to be my second in command," she explained.

"Of course," the Uchiha nodded.

Kira and Lamb stood, "Later guys," they waved to the four and followed Itachi to the castle.

As they arrived at the guard's lounge Itachi got all of the guard's attention, "Guards this girl is going to be your new captain," Itachi explained, "And this other girl will be second in command," he continued then nodded at Kira, "Kira I'll leave the rest to you."

As the Uchiha and Kisame left Kira looked at them, "Well boys let me just settle one important rule. If you dare betray me or my beta neither one of us will hesitate to kill you," she growled, "Does everyone understand?"

All of them nodded and Kira smiled, "Good."

Months passed and all seven of them lived happily in Wonderland. Kira and Lamb enjoyed their job as head guards, Kisame and Itachi enjoyed one another's company, Hidan and Kakuzu had much rabbit sex, and Sasori and Deidara happily lived with each other.

So basically everyone lived happily ever after.

A/N well it's over. i hope you guys enjoyed it. i sure did. :D


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